? A Tale of 2 Emails ?

2 emails slid into my stuffed inbox.

Both had subject lines with my name in it.

? Opened! ?

Email #1 ?

Person A wanted free industry advice and help but wasted the entire email talking about themselves and their needs. (I get this all the time)

Email #2 ?

Person B wrote a lengthy email about MY needs and pain points (after thoroughly researching everything about me online).

The well-written email was super specific, personalized and offered a solution I already needed, but hadn’t found yet.

They entered the conversation already happening in my mind…

Flattered me in a genuine way…

Sympathized with my pain points…

Then showed me the solution’s many benefits and proof of results.

Which email do you think I replied to? ?

Writing emails that sell yourself is an ART. Master it and you’ll get almost anyone to reply to your offer.

Without further ado, here is my cold email template for approaching potential clients. I encourage you to swipe it, make it your own and try it out!


A Tried n’ True Formula:

  1. Casual greeting
  2. SPECIFIC Praise (do your research, then stroke your prospect’s ego)
  3. Pain point + agitation OR describe a problem your prospect may or may not be aware of (do more research)
  4. Offer a tailored solution (be thoughtful)
  5. Case study and/or social proof (be relevant)
  6. Call-to-action (be concise)
  7. Signature

Fictional Example

Happy Monday Alex,

My name is Jackie. I found you on LinkedIn through our mutual connection, Leah Winters. :)

Congrats on launching HaloView last month! Your software’s jaw-dropping AI features are SUPER impressive. Condensing 362 pages of text into three sentences…WOW, what an unforgettable demo!

I was checking out HaloView’s snazzy new website and noticed your home page doesn’t feature any case studies or testimonials!

As you know 90% of users read several testimonials before purchasing new software. Adding key customer reviews will increase brand credibility.

Your revolutionary software needs to continue building trust in the online education industry, especially during an economic downturn.

With a few copy tweaks, HaloView’s home page will blow its competitors’ sites out of the water (especially TruView). You could be hitting all-time-high sales figures by the start of the next quarter. Hello, increased market share! Does that sound like something you might be interested in?

Would you like to drive more conversions, sales and profit by optimizing your website’s UX/UI and refining the copywriting?

As a conversion copywriter and marketing strategist with 10+ years of experience, I can help you generate more free trial sign-ups just by tweaking some of your web copy using proven CRO techniques.

I recently helped RenewGen, a SaaS startup in the dental industry, optimize their landing page copy. Within 2 weeks, sign-ups increased by 183%! Check out the full case study here.

Feel free to say no but…are you open for a 15-minute call next week to chat about how we can work together? Thanks for your time! I appreciate it.


Conversion Copywriter | Marketing Strategist

The key to success using this template is RESEARCH. The more specific and helpful you are, the greater your chances of success. I’ve used this “formula” many times with success. Hope you try it out as well!


Published On: July 4th, 2020 / Categories: copywriting /